How to Deal with People - Sage B. Hobbs

First, I have two words for you: Rita Brent.

Please listen to this podcast episode with the phenomenal comedian, Rita Brent, on being a Black, Queer, former military musician from Mississippi, and rising star in the comedy space. Her story is inspiring. Her wisdom is beyond her years. And her humor is on point! Spotify, Apple Podcasts — wherever you grab your podcasts, you’ll find it.

For now, we’re only releasing one season of the show a year — and this season is amazing.  Let me know what you learned/loved from listening!

Secondly, phew. It’s September, folks. I last wrote to you about the anxiety and excitement of August’s transitional season. [Here it is, if you want support on managing change.] 

We’re beginning to “settle in” to the rhythm of the new school year (with a teacher husband who’s also in graduate school, a 9 year old and 13 year old, and my work with principals — school transitions are a lot in our world.) 

What’s been coming up for me the most lately is how do I help my clients (and my loved ones!) manage all of the emotional information that they’re sifting through daily? 

I’ve been working in depth with more than 50 leaders on evaluating their own emotional intelligence and how it impacts their work (and life outside of work).  

Here are some common questions that I’ve been asked.  

“Sage, how do I have a conversation with someone who keeps stirring up conflict on our team so that the behavior changes and I don’t make it worse?”

“Sage, how do I share my ideas and knowledge without seeming overbearing?”

“Sage, I’ve never been comfortable showing my emotions.  We didn’t do that in my family.  Why should I start now?”

“Sage, I know I should have more compassion, but it’s just so frustrating when people don’t do their jobs.”

“Sage, I’ve been told that I can seem intimidating or mean and I have no idea where that’s coming from.”

And “Sage, how do I coach someone to actually improve their performance, without hurting their feelings?”

These are hard, important, and often neglected questions. If you work with me, you already have a lot of skills and expertise that have landed you in your current position. Intellectually, you likely understand what needs to be done to improve a situation… but the nuance, the subtlety, the art of navigating the messiness that is PEOPLE is the harder part.

Start with these three simple (but not easy) questions:

How am I feeling right now, really?

How do I want to express myself, intentionally?

How may others be feeling, based on their body language and the words coming out of their mouths?

Hit reply and let me know your thoughts on this.  I love to hear from you.

With love, courage, and connection,


P.S.  When you’re ready, here are 3 ways that I can help you or your organization. We’re currently at capacity, but are always interested in building out great future collaborations.

  • Leadership coaching that supports you in leveraging your strengths and building your capacity. 
  • Team training and development that builds trust and connection.
  • Motivational speaking at colleges and organizations

If you want to talk further about bringing my work to you or your team, please schedule a call HERE